School counselors work throughout the year on having students express their feelings in appropriate ways, how to deal with their anger, and how to cope with stressful situations. But what happens when school is not in session, especially during the extended summer break? As a parent, you are the most influential person in your child's life. How you work through family issues can have a positive influence on your child's behavior throughout the family and school. Here are some parenting tips from the American School Counselors Association that you can work on throughout the summer months:

• Sibling Conflicts
  It is a good idea for parents to help their kids learn how to work out their differences peacefully. One way to do this is through using "I messages." The "I messages" include such phrases such as "I feel…because," "I want you to…" For example, "I feel angry because you called me a name and I want you to stop."
  
  It is also a good idea to encourage your children to listen to other people's "I messages" and then repeat back to them what they understand they heard. For example, "You said that you do not want me to call you names, and you want me to stop. I will stop calling you names."

 
• Discipline
  Children develop security, increased self-esteem and have fewer behavior problems when in an environment that provides consistency, rules, consequences, praise, and positive acclamations. Consistency means as a parent you are predictable. For example, every time your child throws a fit at a store, Mom or Dad will leave the store.
  
  Having rules in print is also important. When the child breaks a rule, the parent can point to a printed sheet and ask, "What is the rule?" This takes the heat off the parent and places it on the "rule." The rules need to be at the child's developmental level and sometimes, when they're created with the child and parent, there is more of a buy-in from the child.
  
  Choose consequences that fit when rules are broken. For example, coming home late from being at a friend's house might mean that your child cannot see that friend for a few days. Praise is also important. Look for the good in your child and praise it. It helps build their self-esteem.

 
• Parental Conflicts
  There are two words that you can use when your child wants to have an unending argument or defy your authority. They are "nevertheless" and "regardless." These words are simple argument deflectors. For example,
  Parent: John, please pick up your room and then feed the dog.
  Child: But, Mom, Sarah never has to do any chores.
  Parent: Nevertheless, I want you to pick up your room and feed the dog.

 
• Family Meetings
  These family meetings should occur once a week. It should be a time when there is an open forum, not talking about discipline or punishments, but rather listening to your children's feelings and concerns and asking them to listen to yours. This open communication can foster positive relationship.